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posted by Chris on August 19, 2008 9:59 AM in Food
There's bacon salt, bacon chocolate, bacon band-aids, bacon wallets and bacon suits. Bacon has become a timeless internet meme, allowing nerds everywhere to embrace and celebrate the crispy, porky goodness. I'm a fan of putting bacon on just about everything (bacon-rapped hot dogs being a staple in my home), but what is the best way to cook it? Frying in a skillet will cover your stove (and yourself) in oil splatters and shrinks the strips to little unmanageable curled messes, and those clever microwave solutions turn out to be not-so-clever in practice. Enter the Alton Brown method, as outlined here on Eating, Etc. I've been cooking bacon in the oven for years for a few reasons: it's convenient and it produces a consistent shape. Perfect for stacking your BLTs, flat bacon is the way to go.
My method differs slightly from the article I am linking to, but the gist is the same.
1. Place a wire cooling rack on a cookie sheet (foil lining isn't necessary, though it does help with cleanup)
2. Place a few strips of bacon on said wire rack. Use as many as you would eat. Do not eat it yet, though.
3. Place the sheet into a cold, non-pre-heated oven and amp up the temp to 400 degrees. Go sit down. Do something else for a while.
4. Once the oven is preheated, check every 5 minutes or so until it reaches the consistency you'd like.
5. Now it is okay to eat the bacon.
Seriously, every time I cook bacon like this for people they are impressed. It is so easy.
Jinny and I are always jotting down ideas in a shared Google Document for a possible fancy dinner party menu. We love cooking for people, as it seems that not many people in our generation really cook for themselves anymore. We've been experimenting with a ton of different styles of food, Jinny brings mass amounts of Korean cooking knowledge to the table, while I lean more French/Italian. We'll post some of these recipes here in case you Geekateers would enjoy following along on our quest for culinary perfection.
We love making hamburgers. It's easy, quick, and infinitely variable. Hamburgers are one of those foods that anyone can appreciate (unless you're a vegetarian, in which case - get out of my kitchen) and can be instantly bumped up to gourmet status with special ingredients, and a little bit of technique. It's so simple to make your own hamburger patties, and the ones you mix at home have way more flavor and texture than those crappy frozen pre-made ones you can buy at the store. As with any dish, it's all about the quality of ingredients. If you can't find some of these ingredients, you could always make substitutions, but food is one of those things that Jinny and I never skimp on.
Here is a great Italian variation on the burger we came up with. Last time we served this to friends, tears welled up in their eyes as they uttered "This is the best burger I have ever eaten". I definitely agree. And if you're a bit squicked out by anchovies, don't worry. They only exist to accentuate the flavor, the burgers do not come out all fishy. This is an adapted recipe from the photograph there, we have since improved it. Cooking is all about evolution, like Pokémon!
Pesto Burgers
Feeds two humans
1lb ground beef (grind your own or get the least lean package at the store. The more fat the better!)
Potato Hamburger Buns
Pesto (for spreading. A jar would do. Or make your own!)
2 Anchovy fillets (packed in oil is best), minced
1 large shallot, minced
One nice heirloom or beefsteak tomato, sliced
Sriracha
Balsalmic Vinegar (any old kind will do. Don't use your best, though. Save that for salads.)
Soft cheese such as chevre (Ricotta would also work. Need a dry, salty cheese.)
2 slices panchetta (bacon makes a good substitute)
Kosher salt, pepper
1. Spread butter on the buns (tee hee) and toast until slightly brown. Let cool.
2. Finely chop the shallot and the anchovy and mix into the hamburger in a big bowl. Use your hands for this. Squishy fun ensues. Add about a tablespoon of kosher salt and a half a tablespoon of cracked black pepper. Add about 2 tablespoons of balsalmic vinegar and a hefty squirt of the sriracha. Don't have sriracha in the house? Well shame on you. You can substitute with a dash of cayenne pepper. Mix well. Squish squish.
3. Form two patties by creating a ball with half the mixture and pressing it between your hands. Try to keep the edges from falling apart and be gentle. Place on a plate and make a slight depression in the middle. Cover plated patties with saran wrap and put in the fridge to set.
4. Heat up your pan (preferably a cast iron skillet) and cook the panchetta or bacon until crispy. Do not drain, as bacon fat is what Jesus' tears are probably made of. Remove panchetta from pan and let drain on paper towels.
5. While the pan is still hot and the bacon fat is fluid (but not smoking), place your patties into the pan. Don't move them at all for the first minute, as this will impede the progress of the browning. Try to avoid the silly fast food thing where you press the meat with a spatula. You really don't want those juices to escape, and the depression you made earlier should keep the shape nice and neat. Flip once (and only once!) and cook for another minute on the other side. These are best at medium rare, but if you like charcoal burgers you could always cook them longer. Remove to a plate and let sit while you dress the buns.
6. Spread chevre on one side of the buns and pesto on the other. Place burger on the bottom bun and top with pancetta. Add a slice of tomato and serve alongside fries or tater tots. I prefer tots.
posted by Ross on April 30, 2008 10:26 AM in Comics, Food
Nescafé will be releasing a number of limited edition coffee cans featuring illustrations from the best-selling franchise because one can't be expected to assassinate well unless one is properly caffeinated.
I know now that absinthe is legal in the states, all you crazy kids are going to want to go out and get all wacky on the green stuff. As a long-time absinthe drinker myself I can tell you that it is indeed delicious, but it's not the crazy party drug pharmaceutical that movies such as Moulin Rouge portray it to be. You won't see Kylie Minogue in a Tinkerbell outfit if you drink it, though you might get a special headache in the morning if you are lucky. This intrepid baker has decided to incorporate the beverage into a cupcake recipe, which to me sounds awful.
Making absinthe cupcakes is not at all a fun mash up like adding bacon to ice cream. That fits. Absinthe is an anisette, which means that it tastes not wholly unlike licorice. Have you ever had licorice cupcakes? With one giant sugar cube on top? No? There's a reason for that. The horrible taste is the reason. If you get your hands on some absinthe (might I recommend MANsinth for the comedic value of the name alone?) please don't make this recipe and then blame me for your projectile vomiting. I absolve myself of all responsibility.
This is a little anecdote I believe I may have mentioned on the show once before, but I may not. And it may have been back in the college radio days. Either way, I wanted to share it with you all (again).
In 1995, Orenthal James Simpson was dubiously acquited of all wrong doing in the "trial of the century" regarding the knifey deaths of Nicole Brown and Ronald Goldman.
Mr. Simpson, since his time as a football athlete of some note, earned the nickname "The Juice" due to the fact that is first initials are O.J.
Shortly after the acquittal, Starburst subtly and quietly changed its slogan.
I am a huge food fan. I love to cook, and I love cooking for people even more. Alton Brown is my hero, Anthony Bourdain is my idol and one of my favorite material possessions in the universe is my cast-iron skillet. One of my life goals is to go to El Bulli in Spain, just to experience the 8-hour dinner ordeal first hand. Can't make it to Spain? Maybe (not likely) you can get a reservation at Thomas Keller's French Laundry in California. A super exclusive and critically acclaimed establishment, The French Laundry features dishes never before created, and a rotating menu of wonder. This man is a food magician (he even was a consultant on Ratatouille!).
I discovered a new food blog today via Slashfood, called French Laundry at Home, where a very eager and earnest woman named Carol attempts cooking every recipe from the French Laundry official cookbook. The dishes are gorgeous, and her descriptions are even better. From her post about a soft shell crab dish...
With my left hand, I picked up one of the crabs from the platter and held him from behind. In my right hand, I held the scissors. As I got the scissors close to the crab's face, it started twitching and writhing, and I couldn't do it. I don't know if you've ever held or touched a soft-shell crab before, but instead of a skeletal underbelly and a hard shell on top, the underbelly is not very hard, and felt as thin as a shrimp shell. The top shell feels like thin leather, or perhaps fish skin -- probably the same thickness/texture as halibut. So, when the crab started moving around, I could feel his insides moving, too.
I put him back on the platter and paced my tiny, tiny kitchen trying to talk myself off the ledge. I saw a bottle of Ketel One on my wine table and thought maybe a shot of liquid courage might help, but I didn't do it. Instead, I grabbed a pair of tongs and used those to pick up the crab. I opened the scissors and let out a "aaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii'msosorry" as I cut its face off. Things started to ooze out of the front of his head, and I just repeated a mantra of "thisisgross-thisisgross-thisisgross-AAAAACCCCCKKKKK" as I cut off the large claws, then removed the remaining legs. I did this for each crab to get all the cutting overwith at once.
Chuck Palahniuk ain't got nothin' on Carol. Vivid and insightful, this blog is definitely one for the feed reader.
This past weekend, White Mage and I got a chance to see Pixar and Brad Bird's latest magic joyfest, Ratatouille. Chris, Caspian, and their respective ladyfriends were also in attendance.
As with all Pixar films, I've been excited to see this ever since the first teaser trailer came out. They just do everything so right. Pixar owns the world of CG animated movies, and there is no disputing that fact.
For those of you who don't know, Ratatouille is the story of a rat named Remy who is born with an amazing sense of smell. Not content with eating garbage like his rodent brethren, he sneaks into the house in the French countryside where his colony is inhabiting the walls and puts together culinary delights for himself to snack upon while watching his favorite TV chef, August Gusteau. An accident forces them all from their home and Remy gets seperated but ends up in the sewers below the late Gusteau's very own restaurant in Paris. Remy befriends a clumsy garbage boy from the kitchen of the restaurant and uses him to live out his dream of being a famous chef.
So I'd seen on the ol' internet a while ago about this wacky bag of chips from Doritos that had only an odd product number instead of a name. Apparently, they've got a new flavor and want us to come up with a name for it. If you win, you get free Doritos for a year. Whatever.
So anyway, whilst grocery shopping at my local Albertson's, I happened to come across a bag of these things and decided to pick it up to see what they were like. Wanna know what mystery chips taste like? Well click the jump and find out.
OH YEAH! (Oh no). Slashfood posted this ridiculous picture today of some insane lady's Kool-Aid marinated dill pickles. Now, I have heard of using Kool-Aid to dye your hair, to make candy, and even (gasp) mixing it with water to drink, but I am intrigued to find out what a pickle floating in the stuff would taste like. I guess it would all depend on the flavor.
I like sweet pickles just fine, and watermelon pickles are to die for... so maybe these aren't as bad as they sound. Look. As bad as they look.
Slashfood today shows us that we can indeed be geeks even during breakfast. Designer Chris Dimino created this piece to "breathe life into an otherwise outdated product" (the typewriter).
The only problem with this is that I can't get the idea of sticky, syrupy fingers touching my keyboard out of my head.
Full disclosure: I am a Quiznos guy. Their sandwiches, though still fast food and utter shit, are way less shitty than Subway's sandpaper and barkdust special. In a recent ad, Subway's advertising agency proves themselves completely out of touch by showing a fat kid playing video games and just getting fatter.
How could you make this commercial work? Make it funnier. I say when the kid in the game eats the junk food, have the kid in the commercial get exponentially more fat, Mr. Creosote style. Then have Jared come in and stab the kid in his weather balloon-sized stomach with a sandwich, letting all the fat out in a torrent rivaling a fire hose.
Usually when I have my choice to go out to eat, I'll pick either something crazy and new, or comfort food. My usual choices range between sushi and mexican food. Sometimes, you just feel lazy and don't want to make any sort of effort when you go out to eat, even in digestion. Enter the KFC Famous Bowl. It's pretty much already digested for you with it's sickening stack of mashed potatoes, popcorn chicken, sweet corn, gravy and cheese. What else do you top something so fatty? Oh, of course, cheese.
Even though it looks pretty much the same going in as it does coming out, it is one of the most delicious things ever invented by man. But boy howdy is it unhealthy. Blogger Hungry Girl has come up with her own, healthier version of the Famous Bowl if you feel like constructing this monstrosity in your own kitchen. I know what I am having for dinner tonight!
We seem to discuss bandages a lot on The Weekly Geek. Maybe it's because geeks tend to be accident prone, perhaps it's just because everyone as a kid would fake getting an "owie" just so that they could sport that new cartoon character band-aid their parents picked up from the store.
As adults with our own incomes, we can now recreate that child-like feeling with Urban Outfitters' bandages. For six bucks you can pick up a tin of 25 bandages in flavors like Jesus, Bacon & Eggs, Pirate and Beef. Thus proving that yes, everything is better with bacon. These will go very well with my bacon wallet, and the bacon car air freshener my wife got me for my birthday.
Make sure you remember where you were the moment you learned that Sexualcabinetry began his weekly column on the Weekly Geek, The Mind Boggleth, because in 30 years, it will come up in conversation much like Kennedy's assassination, only somehow better. This week, he examines that creepy Burger King and his latest foray into video games on the now defunct (and wip3d) X-Box 360. The views expressed in this column don't necessarily reflect those of weeklygeekshow.com or the majority of the human race, for that matter, but it's about time a lone man... in a time of hypocrisy and greed... takes forth a blade... AND FIGHTS FOR WHAT'S RIGHT... COMING THIS SUMMER...
I like to think that people who visit this website probably have some of the same sensibilities I do, so I bring you food porn. Last night I made pretty much my favorite food in the world, caprese salad. It is fresh mozzerella, tomatoes, basil and olive oil. Simple, clean, and absolutely amazing. Here's how to make it!
What you'll need:
2 Balls (Approx 8 ounces) Fresh Mozzerella must be fresh, in the liquid. If you use shredded or string cheese or something I will kill you.
2 smallish tomatoes (romas are best for this).
A hefty handful of fresh basil again, if you use dried basil or something, death is imminent.
Your best extra-virgin olive oil (you should have this on hand anyway, shouldn't you?).
salt (kosher is the best).
fresh ground pepper.
Cut the tomatoes and mozz into medallion sized pieces. You can do the basil in a number of ways, chiffonade is good for maximum basil coverage, but you can tear the leaves or use them whole if you want it to be more of a salad green kind of thing. Mix gently in a bowl (so you don't crush the cheese) with the olive oil and a pinch of salt. After it is all mixed, dress with a swig of more olive oil on the top, grind some pepper, and you are ready to eat! EAT IT! IT'S DELICOUS!
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There's bacon salt, bacon chocolate, bacon band-aids, bacon wallets and bacon suits. Bacon has become a timeless internet meme, allowing nerds everywhere to embrace and celebrate the crispy, porky goodness. I'm a fan of putting bacon on just about everything (bacon-rapped hot dogs being a staple in my home), but what is the best way to cook it? Frying in a skillet will cover your stove (and yourself) in oil splatters and shrinks the strips to little unmanageable curled messes, and those clever microwave solutions turn out to be not-so-clever in practice. Enter the Alton Brown method, as outlined here on Eating, Etc. I've been cooking bacon in the oven for years for a few reasons: it's convenient and it produces a consistent shape. Perfect for stacking your BLTs, flat bacon is the way to go.
I am a huge food fan. I love to cook, and I love cooking for people even more. Alton Brown is my hero, Anthony Bourdain is my idol and one of my favorite material possessions in the universe is my cast-iron skillet. One of my life goals is to go to El Bulli in Spain, just to experience the 8-hour dinner ordeal first hand. Can't make it to Spain? Maybe (not likely) you can get a reservation at Thomas Keller's French Laundry in California. A super exclusive and critically acclaimed establishment, The French Laundry features dishes never before created, and a rotating menu of wonder. This man is a food magician (he even was a consultant on Ratatouille!). 
OH YEAH! (Oh no). 
We seem to discuss bandages a lot on The Weekly Geek. Maybe it's because geeks tend to be accident prone, perhaps it's just because everyone as a kid would fake getting an "owie" just so that they could sport that new cartoon character band-aid their parents picked up from the store. 
I like to think that people who visit this website probably have some of the same sensibilities I do, so I bring you food porn. Last night I made pretty much my favorite food in the world, caprese salad. It is fresh mozzerella, tomatoes, basil and olive oil. Simple, clean, and absolutely amazing. Here's how to make it!