Oh no they didn't
Every year the fine folks making Penny Arcade Expo happen put together a whole host of panels. Some of these panels are informative like the Podcasts and Blogs panel, some are stultifyingly dull and obnoxious like the Frag Dolls panel, and some are so completely off the wall that you don't realize what's happened until you wake up in a hotel bathtub full of ice with one of your kidneys missing. It's this last variety I had the extreme fortune to catch.
At the end of Friday's Penny Arcade Panel, with guests having strode on stage to Hustlin' and barely intelligible questions having been asked, Tycho and Gabe made an announcement concerning a surprise guest Q&A panel. Who would this mystery guest be? Apparently Jack Thompson declined (probably a wise choice) and Wil Wheaton had given the keynote speech so it couldn't be him. What big name could the stars of Penny Arcade have cadged for fans to barrage with questions? That big name dear readers, was Uwe Boll.
Mr. Boll strode on stage amidst jeering and booing looking for all the world like a bewildered, and slightly cranky, child. Had he perhaps been duped? Was he under the impression he would be receiving an award of some kind? Oh no, he knew exactly where he was, and to him this was simply an opportunity for him to spew more rhetoric regarding how good his movies are and to show a preview of his most recent attempt to make a rambling, Germanic, fever dream interpretation of a comedy movie. What Uwe actually previewed was a blatantly racist, confusing movie clip that served as further justification for the extermination of gingers worldwide. Apparently, Postal is so tainted throughout Hollywood that several actors have been told by their agents point blank not to do this movie, resulting in Zack Ward being given the leading role.
Following the preview for his latest abomination Uwe's keepers beat him with cattle prods until he agreed to take some questions. Predictably, the first person to the mic was someone launching an expletive laden screed at the now very stern faced director followed by several people congratulating Mr. Boll on his display of testicular fortitude for simply showing up in the first place, which is a point I must concede.
As Mr. Boll was lambasted and congratulated for his magnificent balls a steady stream of people walked out, most shaking their heads, some tittering behind fingers and fox-ear hats, which was truly unfortunate. These people all missed the opportunity to hear Boll explain why his movies are actually good in response to a question from an audience member asking why he continues living when everything he produces is absolute garbage. Mr. Boll's excuse for his movies went a little something like this, "You take a look at Bloodrayne and you might not like it, but if you put Bloodrayne up against Ultraviolet or Elektra you're going to want to watch Bloodrayne".
Take note amateur film makers, according to Uwe Boll (someone who has obviously made it in Hollywood) it's ok to make a really bad movie so long as it's not as bad as someone else's.
What say you?!